Before anyone thinks I actually want a long-distance relationship, I assure you that is not the case.
The truth is I haven’t been home for more than 2-1/2 weeks since January. That makes maintaining any relationship, let alone starting one, pretty difficult. However, because of tinder, there has been someone that I’ve gone on several dates with in the past month, and he lives right here in NYC. To be honest, he lives in Astoria which may as well be another time zone but geographically, he’s only 8 miles away! He’s 2-1/2 years younger than me, and the difference is felt sometimes, but what I like about him is… well, several things. He’s smart and funny and has the geeky adorableness that I love. But above all that, he asks questions (maybe because that’s part of his job), he listens, and he tries. On our first date, one of the things I told him is that I want a man to be a man. When he asked what I meant by that, I told him that part of that means being a gentleman which – come on, ladies – is few and far between these days. So when I just about called off our 3rd date which was the first one on his turf in Astoria, he immediately wanted to know why and what could he do to change my mind. Flat out, I told him that I was not going to his neighborhood alone. He changed his plans and came to meet me at my office so we could go to Queens together. That was the correct thing to do.
At dinner, the subject inevitably came up. He said that he was confused because he takes me as a strong and independent woman who obviously knows her way around the city. While I agreed, I said that was not the point. It’s the principle! I continued by telling him that I know how I want to be treated, and if that’s not cool with some guys, I totally understand. Be a gentleman. Put in some effort because I will move mountains for you if I see that you’ll do the same for me. If not, keep it movin’.
I went to Queens yesterday, unescorted, and spent the rainy evening together, napping and watching tv. It was so necessary. He leaves for two weeks just before I return, so I’m not sure what’s going to happen when we’re back. Will one of the LA dudes be a game changer?? Remains to be seen, but I really do need to finish packing now!