When They Cock Block Themselves (and When They Don’t)

There’s been a major shift in my rotation’s momentum over the past few days.  I chalk it up to a shit storm in other aspects of my life that make me even less tolerable of nonsense and bullshit than I normally am.  Let’s begin!

Seattle guy :Heart-eyes-emoji

He’s barely been back in Seattle since officially moving, having just gotten back from a family trip to Hawaii before going to LA for the weekend.  We caught up a few days ago via FaceTime which was a first, and it was sooo awesome to SEE him again; it was the first time in almost a month!  We talked about all sorts of things, and I brought him up to speed on the other goings on in my life.  We talked about grad schools and how he looked into NYU Stern (!!!).  I’d said it wasn’t for me, but maybe it’s for him… despite that hefty price tag.  We talked about when we’d see each other again.  He said he wants to before he gets too settled into life in Seattle, with work and other responsibilities that may come.  I told him that unfortunately all my August weekends are booked, which is true… except for the very last one, I just realized.  He seemed kind of bummed by that, but I would absolutely love love to see him.  I’m trying to figure something out… He’s obviously NOT the one cock blocking himself.  He even asked me for my address because he wants to send me a little something.  I love gifts!  #swoon


LA guy: Bt_GjBjIUAAZho4

This.  Fuckin’.  Guy.  The more I talk to him, which is often, the more turned off I start to get.  Not a good sign.  Enter the self-cock-blocking.  First, there were her crutches in his bedroom.  Next, there’s the painting.  As I believe I documented in an earlier post, finding out who she is, what she looks like, etc. was not difficult in this age of social media, thanks mainly to her public IG profile.  So last night, when I asked him if she was one of the two women in the big-ass painting (I’d say 48″ square canvas) over his sofa was her, he said yes.  At least he wasn’t lying because I already knew the answer.  I see this painting practically each time we video chat.  Also, things happened on that sofa while I was there!!  In any case, he went on about how he never wanted the painting but when they parted ways, she didn’t have room for it in the tiny apartment that she was moving to, and he felt bad tossing it because they’re friends with the artist, and how that day they were moving out, things got mixed up and lost and it was a bad day and I’m over here like   images .  He must have gotten me confused with someone who gives a shit about the backstory.  MIND YOU just two days before, I’d said how I was physically and emotionally incapable of even entertaining the idea of dating him as long as they live in the same city.  He said he understood, especially with me living so far away despite his claims that they don’t talk or see each other much.  

This.  Fuckin’.  Guy.  He doesn’t realize how badly he’s cock-blocking himself.

I’ve resolved to never go back to his apartment.  Part of me is quite done with him, to be honest.  Is all this really worth it??  Part of me wants to tell him that if he accepts the job offer in Philly (which could come very soon, like tomorrow, if it does), then we can start over again in a neutral zone.  It’s nearly 2pm here and I haven’t heard from him, and I sure as hell ain’t reaching out to him.  I certainly don’t want to video chat with him and see his ex-wife behind him looking right at me anymore.  Part of me thinks that he’s taking the painting down right now, but another part thinks he’s too lazy to bother.

All I know is that I start to care less and less.  What does this mean for his trip out here in a few weeks?  Part of me wants to tell him to go stay with his friends and maybe see each other for dinner or something.  Part of me wants nothing to do with him.  A bigger part of me would rather spend the weekend with Seattle guy instead.  I haven’t taken the days off of work, but I may as well anyway whether or not I see him, since I have so many days to use.


Queens guy… who?  After not seeing him last weekend, and then him being out of town this weekend, this one is safe to call dead.  Last time we saw each other was the end of June sometime… it’s not August.  HAHAHA!  Yea, we’ve communicated here and there, but nothing consistent and ALWAYS text messages.  It’s Sunday now, and I haven’t heard from him since Wednesday.  He suggested we do something this week when he gets back, but I don’t know when that is, and umm… I’ve already got plans this week.  Oh, and also – he’s basically a stranger to me again.

I read one of these LIST articles, something like “12 Ways You Know You’re Dating a Strong Woman” and #2, sure enough, was that texting is not the primary way to communicate with her.  YASSSSSS!!!

So if this one hasn’t already fizzled out in his mind, I’m going to have to put it to bed myself.  He’s a cool guy, and I do like him – as a person – but our personalities and lifestyles do not lend themselves to anything substantial.


There is a first date on the horizon with a guy we’ll call “Dude with the Dog”.  He lives in Brooklyn!  He runs!  He has a dog!  We’re doing something on Tuesday!  Stay tuned…

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