It Ain’t No Lie, Bye Bye Bye

It’s been a busy week and it’s only Tuesday.  Damn.  Attempts at rebuilding my rotation have kicked into high gear after this round of exits which includes umm… just about everyone.

LA guy:  not long after my last post two days ago, he texted me to tell me that he took the painting down and gave her back the stuff he could pack with him on his motorcycle that morning.  the painting, however, was going to have to wait till she was back in town and he could figure out how to get it to her.  see, my issues with this guy are:

  • i told him a month ago that their relationship made me uncomfortable.  it never occurred to him to do anything about it, not even ex-proof his apartment before i got there, so i guess how i felt didn’t matter much to him.
  • do i really have to get upset and spell every last thing out to him?  where’s the initiative?  the thought?  the consideration?  and you want me to seriously consider a life and future with you?  not at this rate.
  • all these things you say you want to do – get rid of her stuff, go to a doctor for a check up, etc. – it takes ME to get you to do these things?  are you that lazy?  i talk to you everyday and you don’t do shit on many of those days.
  • did i seriously just tell you to Uber XL the painting to her and solve that problem for you?  jesus christ.  what goes on in that brain?

He apologized for his stupidity, for getting upset with me, for being numb to the remaining pieces of their marriage, for not considering how it would affect me and make me feel, for letting me down.  He said he should err on the side of being a gentleman and go out of his way to make me comfortable and happy because I would do it for him.  He didn’t want things to end like this, but they did.  I have to tell you that being a gentleman is a good thing?  He’s from the south; out of all people, he should know that much.

I did grow attached to him, and it wasn’t an easy decision to make.  But I absolutely will not settle for less than how I want to be treated, and unfortunately, he wasn’t cutting it.  I told him that the only way I’d ever be comfortable with an ex-wife situation is if they never spoke.  However, since I’m not in the business of telling grown-ass men who they can and can’t be friends with, the “us” that could’ve been will not be.  I didn’t ask if he’d heard anything about the job in Philly; I figured he would’ve just told me.  Doesn’t matter anyway.

He said he’s still coming to NYC and said he still wants to spend it with me.  I shot that down, saying that doing so would just get me mad and upset and hurt all over again, all of which I typically try to avoid.  I haven’t made alternative plans for who to bring with me to the concert on Saturday, but I told one of my friends who sounded interested.  I have zero intention of contacting him while he’s here.  Fortunately, he doesn’t have my home address, although finding my work address is super easy.  I don’t think he’s the type of guy to do any drastic actions; he barely performs any actions.  So it’s safe to say CASE CLOSED.

Queens guy: it’s been one full week since we “spoke” (texted).  That’s done.

Dude with the dog: stood me up tonight!  Maybe he saw me from a distance and didn’t like what he saw, and bailed.  That’s fine, though; I wasn’t in the mood.  The stuff with LA guy just went down minutes before I was supposed to this fool.  It all worked out.

Divorced guy #2: noteworthy because tinder.  Also because when he told me that he’s been divorced for 2-1/2 years and he and his ex-wife are still really good friends and have known each other since college, she’s in love with another dude that she has a baby with, and he meets her for dinner “just as friends” once a month, I said “HELL FUCKING NO.”  Is this Groundhog Day??  So I told him the same, that the only way I’m comfortable with an ex-wife situation is basically if she doesn’t exist.  No talking, no monthly dinners, nada.  There are no kids – so wtf?  He said that I wasn’t the only woman who’d said this, and his last relationship ended because of it, so he said he called his ex-wife, then and there, and said that they weren’t going to talk anymore.  He says he did, and that she said she understood and hoped he finds happiness.  I’ll be gullible and believe him.  Assuming it’s true, that’s more than LA guy would ever do.  For whatever reason, Divorced guy #2 thinks I’m “the most interesting person on tinder”.  Well yea, I’m pretty awesome.  But he was saying how it’s a mistake if I shoot him down and could we give this a chance.  Jesus.  Stop whining, fine.  Gave him my #.  Let’s see.  He probably thinks I’m a mega-bitch now, hahaha!!

Seattle guy:  This one was weird.  We didn’t get to FaceTime while he was in LA after all because, well, he was out while I was home.  I texted him to let him know I was in a taxi home and was he still out?  No response.  So I get on video chat with LA guy and we yell at each other.  Two hours later, Seattle guy calls me while I’m up to my eyeballs in this conversation.  He leaves an unsuspecting voicemail.  I text him after, and totally lie about being asleep.  He says that he thought I was going to call him when I got home (I texted him before I even got home) and that he couldn’t help but think I was out with someone else but that it’s understandable since what “we’re trying to pull off” isn’t easy.  WTF?

I was like, nooooo!!  I also wanted to bang my head against a wall.  What a fucking night.

We agreed to talk the next day when he got home.  He’s all hungover, eyes puffy, and falling asleep.  He said that alcohol did have a role in the message exchange from the night before.


Not his best moment.  That conversation was yesterday.  He hasn’t been nexted, but I’m not sure about that drunk texting business.

Well, that’s the round-up.  A whole lot of NOTHING!!!  Back to square one.


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