A Series of Ethical Dilemmas

As I write this, I wonder if I’m being tested.  I’m sitting at an airline lounge at LAX and six mostly good looking maybe Aussie guys just sat next to me.  WTF is going on?

I opened up this entry to talk about the hot AirBNB host whose guest house I’ve stayed at the past two visits to the area.  Before I left NYC, I was scouring Brooklyn for artisanal, locally made doggie treats for his Doberman who I LOVE!!  I somehow couldn’t find any, so I went with a recommendation from the pet shop employee.  I got to the house and hot AirBNB host was there to help me with my bags.  He opens the door and here comes the dog right at me!  It was so nice!!  He (the dog) was at my side for most of the afternoon/evening till it was time to go to bed.  He brings my bag inside and asks if I’m hungry because he’s got two salmon fillets right there on the stove in a cast iron pan.  Um… YES PLEASE!  So we had a late lunch/early dinner and talked.  He showed me the rest of the house that he’s renovating, and videos and commercials that he worked on, all while his dog is curled up at my feet.  After the meal, he offered to take me wherever I might need to go that evening, but I was pretty spent from the week.  I invited him to my company’s showroom the following morning; I scheduled a tour for my class so they could see how office spaces and furniture can promote certain behaviors.  Since he’s into building things and designing things, I thought he might enjoy it and he agreed to come.  Well, he drove us there (in his loaner Tesla Model S no less) and I showed him around.  He met some of my classmates as well as my professor and class advisor.  He had to leave early, and when he did, the girls in my class asked me who that was, haha! Actually, my class advisor asked me, in front of hot AirBnB host, how we knew each other.  And we looked at each other and I said, well, remember the AirBnB that I stayed at last time?  It’s his house.  Awkward… Sort of, but not really.  He’s a cool guy!  Who just also happens to be rather good looking.  And we get along!  

Unfortunately I didn’t get to see him at all after that.  I got back to the house last night and had to pack up all my shit so I didn’t get to see him, or the dog, then.  I was hoping I’d get to say bye this morning, but he wasn’t home when I left for class.  Sad face.  He texted me and said he’d be back in about 30 min but I was going to be gone by then.  So I locked the door and left the key in the lock, and thanked him for everything.  He said I was welcome and to let him know if I’m back out there and have time to get together, but that he knows I have a busy schedule.  I said that’d be awesome and I’d be back on 4/21 if he’s around (but only stopping in LA before continuing north, so not staying with him!).  He said to let him know if I have time to hang out.  I said I should but will let him know if any flight changes happen.

Is this a date?  Is this what’s happening?  I’m not sure.  My very good friend says it sounds like a casual “let’s hang”.  I don’t want to end up on a date that I don’t know if a date.  THAT is awkward as shit.  I like him.  He’s very smart and did I mention that he’ stood looking?  We get along.  He has a very Type A, intensity about him that I feel I would’ve been more attracted to when I was younger but I like them more mellow now (enter The Giant).  

Oh shit, I just remembered that he complimented me and my attire.  Shit.

He and I have not talked about any current dating situations, but I don’t get the impression that he’s dating anyone with all the projects he’s got going on.  Help!  I have two weeks!  I do like The Giant, quite a bit and I’ve been looking forward to seeing him tomorrow after 2-1/2 weeks!!  But the state of the union is still not entirely clear to me.  All I know is that I don’t have a boyfriend which to me may mean something entirely different to him.  

Ethical dilemma #2 was easier to solve.  While in Utah, the guy I dated wanted to meet up with me.  I didn’t initiate a meetup.  He texted me after I’d been there a few days and I was kind of still not sure what to do.  Realizing that he probably wants to marry his gf and wants to reinforce this idea by crossing off any possible missed opportunities was strike #1.  Strike #2 was that I saw nothing that talking to him would offer me.  Besides, I saw his FB photos and he got fat and bald.  But it was Strike #3 that sealed the deal.  He’d suggested meeting up for lunch or coffee in the afternoon.  That’s when it was clear to me that he was not going to tel his gf, who he lives with, what he was going to do and who he was going to do it with.  I cited that reason for not meeting him, and he said he understood.  Which translates to, damn right I wasn’t going to tell her!

Idiot.  I didn’t want to be his reason for sneaking around.  I have at least a little bit of a moral compass.  


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